diff --git a/esphome/components/bluetooth_proxy/bluetooth_proxy.cpp b/esphome/components/bluetooth_proxy/bluetooth_proxy.cpp
index a263aca456..03213432cd 100644
--- a/esphome/components/bluetooth_proxy/bluetooth_proxy.cpp
+++ b/esphome/components/bluetooth_proxy/bluetooth_proxy.cpp
@@ -265,6 +265,12 @@ void BluetoothProxy::bluetooth_device_request(const api::BluetoothDeviceRequest
                  connection->get_connection_index(), connection->address_str().c_str());
         return;
       } else if (connection->state() == espbt::ClientState::CONNECTING) {
+        if (connection->disconnect_pending()) {
+          ESP_LOGW(TAG, "[%d] [%s] Connection request while pending disconnect, cancelling pending disconnect",
+                   connection->get_connection_index(), connection->address_str().c_str());
+          connection->cancel_pending_disconnect();
+          return;
+        }
         ESP_LOGW(TAG, "[%d] [%s] Connection request ignored, already connecting", connection->get_connection_index(),
                  connection->address_str().c_str());
         return;
diff --git a/esphome/components/esp32_ble_tracker/esp32_ble_tracker.h b/esphome/components/esp32_ble_tracker/esp32_ble_tracker.h
index 99126f9173..8b712a01ea 100644
--- a/esphome/components/esp32_ble_tracker/esp32_ble_tracker.h
+++ b/esphome/components/esp32_ble_tracker/esp32_ble_tracker.h
@@ -173,6 +173,8 @@ class ESPBTClient : public ESPBTDeviceListener {
   virtual void gap_event_handler(esp_gap_ble_cb_event_t event, esp_ble_gap_cb_param_t *param) = 0;
   virtual void connect() = 0;
   virtual void disconnect() = 0;
+  bool disconnect_pending() const { return this->want_disconnect_; }
+  void cancel_pending_disconnect() { this->want_disconnect_ = false; }
   virtual void set_state(ClientState st) {
     this->state_ = st;
     if (st == ClientState::IDLE) {